On Embracing Uncertainty

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Embracing Uncertainty
Yellow flowers at Dublin Castle, Ireland.

In my posts about anxiety and flying fears, I’ve mentioned a lack of control fuels much of my personal angst.

I’m a literature nerd. I like stories about epic journeys and life itself is a journey, isn’t it? Yet I can’t handle any uncertainty. A fuzzy future = a distressed me.

Regarding books, I want to know the endings so much that I pop titles into wikipedia, read entire plot summaries, and spoil myself.

This “look into the future” option isn’t included in the game of life.

Embracing Uncertainty
Tranquil scenery in Yoho National Park, BC.

Soon, I leave for a 6.5 week journey to Central Europe.

There are many experienced travelers in the blogosphere. Bloggers who’ve massive followings and book deals. Bloggers who’ve been on the road for 4+ years. Bloggers who are far more attractive and charismatic than me. And definitely bloggers who are braver than me!

I mean, a flying fear? Come on, girl, get it together.

I’m not jealous of these other bloggers. A lot of them are my role models and their words gave me the push I needed to travel solo for the first time. I joined Travel Blog Success, because I respect their influence in the field and believe their lessons can help me be the best travel blogger I can be.

Trust me, I harbor no resentment about their success.

However, by admiring to these bloggers, I feel like I shouldn’t fret about a simple month and a half adventure through fairytale Central Europe.

But I’m still nervous. Heck, the plane ride from Newark to Berlin is enough to make my mind implode. I even had a dream last night that I forgot my anxiety medication at home.

How lame is that?

Embracing Uncertainty
Excited to go whale watching in Tofino! Hopefully the boat isn’t toooo small.

Right now my biggest goal in life is embracing uncertainty.

My professional life – teaching – is a bit of a hot mess at the moment. I won’t go into details here, but let’s just say I have some pretttttty big decisions to make between now and my return to the USA in August.

I don’t know where my life is headed in the near future. No wikipedia page can guide me.

And that scares me.

At this age, I had expected to own a house, possibly be married, and accumulate a stable income from an equally stable job. I need to accept, however, that the universe has other plans for my time on this planet. Unfortunately for me, the universe is going to keep those plans a secret and leave me to figure out my destiny alone.

I just wish I wasn’t so worried.

But I’ll keep exploring this wonderful earth and soaking up every valuable moment. And one day, “maybe” will transform into a comforting word.

Paris at Night
If only my destiny was modeling in Paris. Ha, I wish!

What are your tips for embracing uncertainty in your life? Are you a person who feels anxious about uncertainty? Or do you love the unknown? Write your responses here.

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